Things I Don't Understand

For the past two days I've been struggling.

There are so many things that I know I need to be doing. One thing is getting up before my kids. I've gone through long periods where I've done this. But lately, and for the past few months, I haven't been doing it.

I struggle with understanding how God works. I know that He does. I am convinced my weightloss is a direct result of that. But losing weight isn't the only change that needs to be made in my life.

So I've been praying that God would help me get up in the morning, before my kids.

Well, so far, I'm not.

I'm not sure if God is telling me that it isn't time for that or if I'm somehow not listening to what He IS telling me.

With all of the things that I stink at, with all of the ways that I continually fail my kids and everyone around me...I think I'm still somehow missing the point.

I'm so thankful for what He's done in my life...losing 111 pounds, so far, is AMAZING and I am SO THANKFUL...but I still have so much to learn...and I have a feeling that He might be in the middle of teaching me something right now.

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